Monday, July 07, 2008
Why does it seem the people I love never seem to love me back?

I'm not talking about the kind of love involved in a BGR but other sorts. Friendship, etcetera. And it's not just that. Trust, if another thing.

I don't know, I feel crappy now.

Why is everyone so afraid of the word 'love'?
And then again, why is everyone misusing the word 'love'?

I've posted this before. I'm ending the post with this.


"Have you ever been in love?
Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up.
You build up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...
You give them a piece of you. They don't ask for it.
They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore.
Love takes hostages. It gets inside you.
It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends" or "how very perceptive" turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart.
It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.
I hate love. "

/Rose Walker, The Kindly Ones.


Good night. And tell me what happiness is to you.

I love and miss a lot of people now. If only if they'd acknowledge that.
9:56 pm

brandnew/eyes
I love sleeping, eating and my imaginary tattoo.

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